Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Anakin: Brotherly Love

Anakin makes a bee-line to the closest speeder-bike rental kiosk.

ANAKIN: Word up, G. Hook me up with one of those illin' bikes.

RENTAL GUY: That's 20 credits per day plus fuel.

ANAKIN: (narrowing his eyes) How 'bout you lemmie have it in exchange for not slaughterin' your family like a bunch of Tusken Raiders, yo. (He pats his lightsaber)

RENTAL GUY: (holding up his hands) It's all yours, man.

Anakin takes off from Mos Eisley and heads towards the Lars Homestead. He pulls up and knocks on the door of the igloo-thing. Owen sticks his head out.

OWEN: I told you already, we paid the electric bill!

ANAKIN: (rolling his eyes) Chill, bro.

OWEN: Dude, what are you doing here? Did you bring back my protocol droid? Why don't you visit more often? Oh, and I've got something here that belongs to you... (sounds of a baby crying in the background).

ANAKIN: I just needta borrow your power generator, bro.

OWEN: Why in the name of Mustafar would I let you do that? I need that for the harvest!

ANAKIN: You wanna do it cause I'm your bro and I'm your only ticket off this riz-ock.

OWEN: That's... not really a good enough reason. What do I get in return?

ANAKIN: You get to chill with me for a couple hours while I dismantle it, yo.

OWEN: (peeking around Anakin) Did you bring your old lady?

ANAKIN: Stop tryin to get all up in my girl's shizzy, yo. 'Sides, she's back on Ciz-oruscant.

(Owen looks deflated, but opens the door for Anakin to enter. The young Jedi takes a look around at the mess - various baby-related items are strewn around the room, there is what appears to be blood splattered unattractively on the floor and walls, and the smell is only slightly worse than the trash compactor on the Death Star)

ANAKIN: You live here, bro?

OWEN: Well some of us don't have cushy government jobs.

ANAKIN: Whatev. Look, you gonna let me hijack your gear or what?

OWEN: I need the generator, but you can have the motor from dad's hoverchair.

ANAKIN: He ain't gonna punch me in the ribs again, is he?

OWEN: Nah, I don't know where he is.

(The baby screams again)

OWEN: BERU! Woman, I told you to keep that thing quiet! (Owen looks at Anakin, a lightbulb going off) You can have the motor, if you take your kid back.

ANAKIN: ...... Are you on crack, bro? I don't got a kid. Just lemmie at that chair.

OWEN: (almost pouting) Only if you take the baby.

ANAKIN: (waving his hand) Just lemmie dismantle the chair, bro.

OWEN: (eyes glazing over) Here, let me get that chair for you.

(Owen disappears into a back room. Anakin tries to find a place that isn't covered in mess to sit down and work, but can't seem to figure out what, exactly, is somewhere to sit and what is a pile of dead Jawas. He walks back outside. A few moments later, Owen appears with the hoverchair.)

ANAKIN: Thanks, bro. Lemmie just get the motor outta this an then I gotta get back to Mos Eisley.

OWEN: Whatever. I'll be inside. It's too hot out here.

(Anakin pulls off the access cover of the chair and begins rooting around inside, looking for the power source. The sounds of arguing and the baby crying can be heard outside. Anakin tries to focus completely on his task, but he is getting frustrated and is running out of time. Finally, he just yanks a handful of wires out of the chair, and yelps as electricity runs up his roboclaw. Beru runs out of the house.)

BERU: Are you okay?

ANAKIN: I... um... whack, dude. My roboclaw's gone all numb an spit.

BERU: Do you need anything? Can I help?

OWEN: (from inside) WOMAN! This baby isn't going to change itself!

(Beru hurries back in the house, leaving a puzzled Anakin beside the chair. Anakin pokes at his arm for a little while, then decides that no reward is worth this, and hightails it back to Mos Eisley - leaving the chair, still gutted, in front of his brother's door)


Blogger flu said...

Your metal grappling hook went numb?

How did you know?

7:54 AM, August 11, 2005  
Blogger Master Yoda said...

Somehow, Young Skywalker, shocked I am not that white trash your family is.

In a nice way I mean that.

9:28 AM, August 11, 2005  
Blogger Aayla Secura said...

You have a child?

12:44 PM, August 11, 2005  
Blogger Anakin Skywalker said...

No way, A-girl. I don't got nothin to tie me down. Cept a slob of a master an the Council who won't let me do nothin....

8:53 PM, August 11, 2005  

Post a Comment

<< Home