Monday, August 01, 2005

Leia: The rescue

So Anakin, Ben and I went out raider-hunting this morning. Fluke told us how to get there after knocking Han out and flying his plane over the place. He specifically told us it was "left, left, left, right, left, left, then north, left again, then right." So we left the camp, and soon realized we had no idea where we were. I mean, what kind of directions are "left" and "right?"

"Are we lost?" I asked.

"Nooo." Anni said.

"I told you we should've taken a right after that left!"

"You didn't say nothin' about takin' a right. It was left the whole time, yo."

Meanwhile, Obi-Wan had his eyes closed, as if he were meditating. Suddenly, he pointed into the distance and said "Beer! That-a-way!" He and Anakin sprinted in that direction and I had no choice but to follow.
Ben's nose led us straight into the Tusken-raiders' camp.

"Give us the frazzog, old man." Anakin said to a particularly short one. It snickered.

"Go ahead and take it." He looked at Anakin. "You think you so bad, boy, talken like dat? You nothin' but white. You whiter than white." Anni's eyes went red. He screamed and snicked its head off. He ran around the camp, screaming and killing as he went. Obi-Wan and I just stood there helplessly.

When he finally got back, like a minute later, he was dragging a drunken-looking Jar-Jar and an enormous keg. "That was easy, yo. They just like women an' children, an I slazzautered em that way." He threw Jar-Jar on the ground. He just sat there, looking at us stupidly.

"Jar-Jar, are you drunk?" I asked.

"Mesa... mesa... oooooh..." he fainted.

"What now? We can't take both the keg and Jar Jar back to camp."

We looked at each other. What are we going to do?


Blogger Anakin Skywalker said...

My vote's still on the keg, yo. We can always get another whacked-out frog-thing.

5:52 PM, August 01, 2005  
Blogger flu said...

Make Jar Jar carry the keg, silly!

9:02 AM, August 03, 2005  

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