Saturday, November 05, 2005

Survivor Epilogue

Wow. My oh my. It’s been a long and crazy ride since July 14th. Twelve challenges, sixteen contestants, 208 posts…who would have thought this would work? I didn’t. Not at first anyway. In the beginning I thought it would be kinda cool if there was some special blog to bring all those in the SW universe together and interact with each other. Who knew it would last three and a half months? (Unforeseen illnesses not withstanding.)

But I was looking over all the posts the other night and I must say….wow. What an amazing body of work! If any of you out there have the time to read over it all again, I suggest you do so. There are some hilarious and wonderful gems of writing…eh…reporting I mean, in there. I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, you all have done a fantastic job.

At first I really didn’t think it would work out. For the first few weeks there were a few people who neither posted nor voted. They just didn’t show up so I thought, “Well this is a bust. Oh well.” But as it turned out, we were just getting used to the situation and getting down to the strong characters.

If I were to do this again, I think I would do a few things differently though. First off, have only fourteen contestants max (and merge at seven or eight). This would help with shaving off a few weeks to make things go a little quicker. I would also have implemented the “no-vote: you’re voted off” rule from the beginning. This would have helped clear away those people who weren’t really interested in the first place. (As a side note, I think I would also try and make sure those who signed up we’re truly committed to the project. I think that was the only real discouraging thing for me about the game when it started) But after the first month, things took off and the remaining players shined like the twin suns of Tatooine!

One other thing I definitely would change: dealing with the dreaded ties at votes. I hated having to randomly determine a tie at vote time. In a game that already relied on chance to determine who won and got immunity, it just seemed too much. Next time…eh, if there is a next time…I think I would do it this way---

Ties would be determined first by how many posts that person has at the time of voting. If you have placed more posts than the other person, you’re safe and the other person gets voted off. This would encourage players to post beyond the one post a week minimum and would have solved all but one of the tie votes for this past game!

But that’s neither here nor there. It was a learning process and I had fun doing it. I loved thinking of crazy challenges and loved even more when the winner who was posted had to figure out how in the world they were going to win. (Or in the case of Han on the swoop bike race, how in the world did he ever come in last?!?) It’s these types of challenges that make the game fun. I think next time I would also put in more creative writing challenges like the Pillar of Doom or the Three rings of Fear, since those type of challenges really pushed the envelope on people’s writing skills. But come on…ya gotta have fun gross stuff like the Hutt lick and jawa BBQ too.

I must say though, I was a bit surprised there wasn’t more posts that dealt with just the simple day to day actions of the characters in camp. I really thought Yoda and Dooku would have it out in some kind of smack down confrontation. There were some, however. I loved the little stinky present given to one of the tribes by the other tribe late one night. And the budding romance of Typho and Siri began in these episodes (Although we all know how well that worked out eventually, don’t we…) That’s why I also added other oddities for you guy to write about: sandstorms, a Tusken raider raid, a crazy idol that changes gender (ooo, I was so hoping Fluke would get that one..) which for the most part all of you did very well with. I am well aware of the burden a second blog has on people, so honestly, I ain’t complaining.

I do have one question for all the contestants though, something that I’ve been wondering throughout the entire game. Were there any secret alliances? Did any of you secretly E-mail each other to say, hey…this is how were going to vote and all? And if not…why not? That’s what Survivor is all about! I’m surprised there wasn’t more of that on the posts too.

Anyway, here is the voting record for all the Tribal Councils.

Names in green denote that that tribe (or individual) won immunity.

The name in bold red was voted off. (If a tie the names will be in bold and the one gone is in red.

An asterisk shows that person didn’t place a vote.

(And remember, this is just a game, so don't hold any grudges on who voted for you.)

Week 1
Ooteeni Tribe

Qui-Gon: Palps
Fluke: Grievous
Palps: Qui-Gon
Aayla: Grievous
Grievous: Obi-Wan
Jar Jar: Fluke
Leia: Grievous
Obi-Wan: Grievous

(It’s a shame Grievous got voted off so early. I always thought he would have some good posts down the road.)

Week 2
Mabbit Tribe

Anakin: Han
Dooku: Mace
Han: Han
Siri: Han
Mace: *
Padmé: Mace
Typho: Mace
Yoda: Mace

(Yes, you’re seeing it correctly…wracked with guilt from the build a droid fiasco, Han voted for himself…and nearly got voted off.)

Week 3
Although Mabbitt won the reward challenge in the obstacle course both tribes went to tribal council

Anakin: Padmé
Dooku: Padmé
Han: Siri
Siri: Dooku
Padmé: *
Typho: Padmé
Yoda: Padmé

Qui-Gon: Palps
Fluke: Obi-Wan
Palps: *
Aayla: Palps
Jar Jar: Obi-Wan
Leia: Obi-Wan
Obi-Wan: *

Week 4
Another reward challenge only with Mabbitt the winners of that.

Anakin: Siri
Dooku: Siri
Han: Siri
Siri: Dooku
Typho: Dooku
Yoda: Siri

Qui-Gon: Palps
Fluke: Palps
Palps: Qui-Gon
Aayla: Palps
Jar Jar: Palps
Leia: Palps

Week 5
Ooteeni Tribe

Fluke: Aayla
Aayla: Qui-Gon
Qui-Gon: Jar Jar
Jar Jar: Leia
Leia: Fluke

An unusual way to call for a tie, have everyone vote for everyone forcing random determination the loser.

Week 6 and the two tribes merged

Aayla: *
Anakin: Aayla
Dooku: Aayla
Fluke: Anakin
Han: Aayla
Jar Jar: Dooku
Qui-Gon: Typho
Typho: Aayla
Yoda: Aayla

Week 7

Anakin: *
Dooku: Jar Jar
Fluke: Anakin
Han: *
Jar Jar: Typho
Qui-Gon: Typho
Typho: Jar Jar
Yoda: Jar Jar

This week had the person who had immunity (Fluke) give a special immunity to someone else (Qui-Gon)

Week 8

Anakin: *
Dooku: Fluke
Fluke: Anakin
Han: *
Qui-Gon: Typho
Typho: Fluke
Yoda: Fluke

Tired of the no-votes, I implemented the no-vote/ get voted off rule in which after a tie on that, Anakin got voted off. Just think though…had Anakin and Han voted, Fluke would probably have been voted off then.

Week 9

Dooku: Han
Fluke: Dooku
Han: Typho
Qui-Gon: Typho
Typho: Fluke
Yoda: Fluke

A really tough tie! I hated randomly picking this one. Had the idea of the person with the most posts wins been in play, Typho would have won this one.

Week 10

Dooku: Fluke
Fluke: Dooku
Han: Yoda
Qui-Gon: Dooku
Yoda: Fluke

Another too close tie!!

Week 11

Fluke: Han
Qui-gon: Han
Han: Fluke
Yoda: Fluke

That made three in a row that Fluke beat the odds. He seemed almost unstoppable until…

Week 12

Qui-Gon: --
Yoda: Fluke
Fluke: --

Since Qui-gon and Fluke canceled out each other, it was Yoda how cast the deciding vote.

The Final Vote

And just in case you were wondering who cast the last big votes…

Dooku: QGJ
Typho: QGJ
Siri: Yoda
Noel: QGJ
Grievous: QGJ
Jar Jar: QGJ
Han: QGJ
Palps: QGJ
Fluke: QGJ
Jon: QGJ
Leia: Yoda
Dormé: Yoda

I’ve got to say I really thought Yoda was a shoe in from the beginning. He hardly ever got any votes against him which made this last vote quite surprising to me.

But hey Yoda…at least you got the chick vote.

Well, that’s about it. I think I’m going to sleep for a month. I hope everyone had a fun time doing this not-so-little adventure. I know I did. I think I might have had the best time of you all cos all I had to do was throw out some bizarre challenges and stuff then sit back and read all the ingenious, hilarious posts.

Will I ever do this again?


Not right away obviously but who knows… Maybe a few months down the road, when the dust has settled and perhaps a new crop of SW bloggers are furiously writing away I may just come back with…oh, I don’t know…Survivor: Hoth?

...We’ll see.

In the meantime, thanks for playing along.

It was a blast.


-J.J out!

P.S. I hear Palps is selling the yellow spedo he wore on the show on Ebay even as we speak.

Friday, November 04, 2005

And the Winner of Survivor: Tatooine is....

Welcome to the special live show finale of Survivor: Tatooine; live from studio R2 in Palpatine Plaza on Coruscant. I’m your host, J.J. and with me are the two survivor finalist, Jedi Master Yoda and Force Ghost Master Qui-Gon Jinn.

Behind me we also have the other fourteen members of Survivor: Tatooine here with us tonight.

Most of which have already cast their votes, but this Survivor is a little different. This time we expanded to include all those in the SW community, some who have watched each episode since it aired way back in July to take part in this monumental vote. As of air time, we have received a healthy 12 votes.

At stake tonight, a million credits. So, without any more rambling, it is time to read the votes. Remember, the votes cast are for who is to become the winner – you want to see their name to win. I’ll now read the votes.

……………first vote……….Qui-Gon

Second vote……………….Yoda








……….Qui-Gon again


………….and Qui-Gon

The winner of Survivor: Tatooine by a vote of 9 to 3….

Qui-Gon Jinn!!!

Congratulations!!! You have just won a million credits along with this trophy as well as these five “Tales of the Jedi” comics by Dark Horse Comics straight from my own personal collection.

As for you, Master Yoda, congratulations to you also. You played a good game and truth to tell this last vote even took me by surprise. But you won’t be walking away completely empty handed. Bring her out, boys. That’s right, you still get to take home with you Bob the mangy, blind FOC bantha. As good as a second place prize as we have ever given out.

Also I would like to say congratulations and thanks to all the contestants who played in the game. You all have done an amazing job and should be very proud of the posts you have placed.

Well, that’s almost it for me. Come back tomorrow for a special wrap-up show finale where I will reveal all the voting strategies from all the votes, talk about some behind the scene antics, what I would do differently and give some final thoughts.

And now…eh…jeez…do I really have to do this? Alright. Well I guess the producers want me to end on a song so here it goes….ahem….

Here he is….Mister Survivor…
Walking down the carpet…
Waving his hand…

Mister Survivor…
He’s got some luck…
Now with his million credits…
He can tell the world to take a flying f--*

(roll credits)

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Qui-Gon : Focusing on Reality

The cave was lit by several lights in decorative Tiffany glass shades. The multicoloured brightness shone on the two residents.
Qui-Gon Jinn, the Force Ghost, and Ogopogo, the Sarlacc, were engaged in a game. There was a map before them, with several well painted pewter figurines placed in strategic squares. Dice of many shapes and colours were scattered around.
Qui-Gon sat, cross-legged, in front of a notebook and a pencil.

"The room you are in smells of mould and rotting flesh," Ogopogo said, his voice like gurgling grinding. "The walls are smeared with dark blood. You can see several hobgoblins, who are mumbling in the corner. There are..."
Qui-Gon interrupted. "Hey, can I use your 'fresher again, man?"
The Sarlacc stopped rolling dice over in his tentacle. "Again? Geez! Go on, just make it quick. I want for your Half-Elf to see the power of the +2 Sword of Wounding."
"Thanks." The apparition dashed off. He returned a few minutes later.
Ogopogo regarded him with a concerned eye-less beak as he floated by.
"I didn't even know that ghosts use the can, man. Are you nervous?"
Qui-Gon laughed, the fray of his nerves obvious in his voice. "Nope. No way, man. You'd know if I was nervous 'cause, like, I'd throw up."
The ghost settled back down.
"You ready?" Ogopogo asked. He took up his two sapphire dice in his ropy tentacle.
Qui-Gon sat still for a moment. There was a sudden acute look of distress that ran across his features and he bolted for the entrance of the cave, a hand clapped over his mouth. Once outside, he dropped to his spectral knees and proceeded to empty his ethereal stomach on the chilly night sands. He sat on his heels and regained his composure, wiping at his mouth with the back of his hand. Slowly, he rose and re-entered the cave.
The Sarlacc asked him,
"You all right there, man?"
Qui-Gon nodded. "Sorry. Must have been something I ate."
"Looked more like everything you ate. How many brownies did you have?"
The ghost shook his head. "Not that many."
A long tentacle reached out to pat the incorporeal being on the shoulder, but merely phased through him. "You're nervous. You can't lie."
Qui-Gon sat hard on the floor of the cave. His gaze dropped to the downward. "I can't deny it. I'm really nervous."
Ogopogo pushed several dice together over the map. "It's okay, buddy. It will all be over tomorrow."
Qui-Gon smiled. "It's not that, man. I'm cool with, like, whatever happens, you know? But, see, with Survivor leaving the holo-vid airwaves, that means that they'll need some new reality programme to fill its place. Even if I win, maybe next month I'll be singing for a spot on Alderaan Idol. Or working as an Apprentice to a Hutt. Or, like, even living some Surreal Life with all these wacky stars from years past."
"Creepy. See where you're coming from." The Sarlacc shrugged a tentacle and pulled his dice behind his fold-out screen. "Let's make the best of it here then."
"Cool. Your focus determines your reality."
Ogopogo continued narrating the mission. "Yeah! Well, your reality is that the hobgoblins have spotted Jard, your hero! Roll for 'inish'!"

Monday, October 31, 2005

The BIG Vote!!!

Alright, some of you have had a chance to ask some questions to our two finalist…not sure I understand most of them, but there you go. We’ve also had a chance to hear both Qui-Gon and Yoda’s reasons for wanting to win the million credits….now it’s time to vote!

Not only is the vote open to all the members of Survivor:Tattoine but as a reward to those who have been patiently reading this blog for the past three months, the vote will also be open to all those in the Star Wars community.

If you are a member of the Star Wars United Forum you can cast your vote now! Just send me an e-mail or personal message through the forum. (This is to insure who sends in the vote only votes once.) Remember…you’re voting for the person you want to win, not be cast out this time.

Yoda, Qui-Gon and myself can not cast a vote but that still leaves potentially twenty-eight other people.

Voting will end this Friday (Nov. 4th) at 9 am pacific time, so vote early…vote now!! Tell your friends! Gather the kids! Let out the frogs!

Good luck to both of you. You both have done a great job, as have all the other contestants of this crazy game.

Alright…..get ready……VOTE!!!

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Qui-Gon : In A Pickle

He was nervous. Though he had replayed the conversation over in his mind hundreds of times for the past few days, he couldn't shake the foreboding feeling in his gut that something was bound to go wrong.
Qui-Gon Jinn clenched his ethereal teeth and drew in a deep airless breath. He braced himself and met the crowd.
Before him were all familiar faces, but all wore looks tainted with anger. The Survivors that had been voted off before had congregated to hear Master Yoda's speech. It was obvious that it had gone over with less than success.
The most unnerving thing was the mangy reeking Bantha that had it's bottom pointed towards the crowd.
He inaudibly chanted
"Do not say pickles." His lips moved, but there was no sound. He knew that he had a brilliant speech, something worthwhile for all, as long as he didn't botch it up.
"What was that, Jinn? Hear you we cannot," Master Yoda said, facing the ghost, with a twinkle in his eye.
"Nothin', man."
The small living Master put a hand on his hip, the other clenching his gimer stick. "Important what ever you are trying to say is, and always has it been, my Former Padawan." His smile was warm regarding the spectre.
"Oh, wow, I was just psyching myself up for the speech," Qui-Gon said.
"Mumbling what you were? Your lips moving I saw."
The apparition froze. He knew what this was about. Master Yoda knew what he was trying not to to. A wave of hurt washed over him as he realised the living master's deception.
"I know what you're trying to do," Qui-Gon accused, sticking a waving finger out in front of Yoda, "You're trying to get me to botch this up and, like, say pickles..."
With a sudden blast, the fully loaded Bantha went off. "Wuaaaarh!" Phlpppt!
People were blown backwards, rolling hard on the sands. The shock-wave threw JJ over the heads of several and far out into the open desert. Those in the crowd held their noses or clenched their shirts over their mouths to try and dampen the intense nauseating reek that blanketed the area.
Fluke stood, howling, "There's a bean in my eye! Gahh!"
Qui-Gon's head dropped to his chest and he heaved a breathless sigh.. "Oh Shazbot."
Unable to hold back any longer Master Yoda burst into laughter. "Priceless this is! Too hard you try, Jinn!" He laughed out loud again. "And stop from saying pickles, you did not."
Bob the Bantha broke wind again, filling the air with more thick chaffy stench.
Qui-Gon ignored the reek of Bantha beans and dashed to JJ's side. "JJ, man, are you all right?"
The Jawa was in the process of losing his catered lunch. He waved the ghost away.
"Oh, wow, man. He made you ralph, man." He laid a gentle hand to the ill Jawa's back.
After JJ finished, he pushed at the spectral form. "You might want to get lost. Fluke may be wearing a jaunty eye-patch from now on, so it might be best if you hide."
The ghost's face was chiseled with hurt. "Oh, wow," he said, in a depressed tone, "Like, take care of Fluke, man, and like, don't tell anyone I'm hiding in the cave, okay?"
JJ nodded, wiping at his mouth with his sleeve. "Just make like the wind..."
"No," JJ said, "Just go. And quick, I think Grievous has out all four lightsabres."
Qui-Gon darted away, head down, not looking back.