Qui-Gon : Long-Haired Freaky Banthas
Right, well, like, I had to shave a Bantha. I already knew how to do it from my training at the summer camp when I was a Junior Padawan Scout. See, they, like, sent us out to the rural part of Tatooine and taught us all the farming techniques. Shaving Banthas, milking Nerfs, collecting moisture... Though I skipped the classes on tabaccy chewin' and cousin courtin'.
Well, yeah, so I came across this Bantha out here. Nice bloke by the name of Jim. See, Banthas don't like long names. There's Bob, and Jim, and Jay, and Leo, and Alf, and well, there's a herd of Banthas. All with names that are three letters or less.
Right, well, Jim, he, like, was on my wavelength, man. He's, like, all about the pastorial existence. No technology but moreso, no bread, man. Bread is the root of all evil today. Attachment to it kills the soul, and you, like, need that to be eligible for Force Ghost status when you die, man.
So we were talking and we got on the subject of hair. Or fur. Or natty dreds that Bantha's have. See, I have long, beautiful, flowing hippie hair. I don't need hours of grooming with Vidal Dantoon products. I just wash it when I can be, like, bothereed to do so, or after if happens to catch fire for some reason. And, like there you go. Hippie locks.
Right, well, like Jim, he's the same way, man. He's got this long shaggy doo, and it is really far out.
And he said that it is natural to be attached to your hair, as it is attached to you. It blew my mind, man. Jim was, like, deep.
So, we decided that he didn't need to shave off his hair, and stuff. He needs it. It is a part of who he is.
Well, like we didn't shave it, but I did give him a good wash and trim and braided some nice flowers in. It's far out, man. Like eight feet of braids. You could get, like lost in it.
Right, well, I guess I lose, but a bantha's style is his image. And Jim is, like, one hep cat.
Can I keep him, JJ?